So, I can't believe I'm actually doing this. I mean, really can't believe I'm doing this but I don't know if... well, I don't know very much right now. So, what the hell, here it goes...
Dear Diary,
First off, the only reason why I'm doing this, in case some one who is not supposed to be reading this happens upon this diary, is because Emma Frost (yes, THE Emma Frost) said this would be a good idea.
See, I'm a mutant. My power allows me to copy other mutant powers. If I try hard enough and concentrate enough, I can steal the powers. The mutant eventually gets them back. How long that takes depends on me. Frost pushed me further and further each time I "trained" with the other students.
She told me to start keeping a journal to remind of memories were mine and which ones weren't. I haven't gotten any other memories though. t felt
Well, until a little bit ago at least... I've started remembering things, I developed new powers. I can fly and I'm a lot stronger.
It calls itself The Phoenix. It knows people. It remembers people. Like Cyclops, Beast, Longshot, Wolverine, Professor Xavier, Iceman, Gambit, Rogue and so man of the X-men. I've never met them. I went straight to Brimstone Academy the first time I accidentally read my parents' minds.
The Phoenix keeps telling me that Jean Grey really isn't Jean Grey. Grey showed up at the memorial and The Phoenix just took over my whole body, my whole BEING and addressed the entire crowd. Told them all that the Jean Grey standing before them wasn't real. Attacked Cyclops, told him "She's dead Scott, you know this," or something like that. It's a touch fuzzy really. It felt like the last time Frost was in my head but a lot less frosty.
We are all The Phoenix. Each with a burning ember inside.
She, The Phoenix, sorry I just really don't want to think that The Phoenix is male. That's just creepy. Like Longshot in just a smoking jacket refusing to put pants on creepy.
Anyway, she, The Phoenix was talking to me, no wait, it was Jean Grey. The fake Jean Grey. The fake, dead Jean Grey was talking to me in the mirrors in Dazzler's mansion. That woman has too many mirrors by the way. Way too many. It's creepy. Like Longshot in a smoking... sorry...
Okay mirrors. Fake Jean Grey talking to me. Back on track.
She told me that The Phoenix isn't telling me something. I don't know how to ask though!
I think I may just be losing my mind. Maybe Frost implanted something in my brain? I don't know. It's really scary.
It's nice to have other mutants around me though. They're all pretty nice. Well, except for Daken. He doesn't seem mean though, just angry. I wonder if Wolverine is as handsome as he is...
Longshot seems kind of sad sometimes, like he misses people. I can't tell if it's The Phoenix or me who wants to give him a big hug and tell him that he is a good person and he's important to people even if he's not a TV star anymore.
Special Agent Danvers is definitely in the right line of work. She's so serious and well, serious. I wouldn't be surprised if she were a ninja. Seriously. She looks like the kind of woman that has some sort of secret awesome power that only comes out when she's super angry or something. OMG! Maybe she's She-Hulk! Nah, that's just silly.
You trust her and not me?
Nightingale is very sweet. I can see the sadness and confusion in her eyes in being in this dimension though. Not going to lie, I would love to see "Auntie Emma" in her version of the world. I bet her cookies are as wonderful as Nightingale says and I bet she does have a beautiful singing voice. My head might explode from that juxtaposition though. I've never known Frost to be anything but a cold woman who is more prone to using cruelty than compliments and encouragement. I still remember the cries of the other students...
She makes her world better than it is. The Phoenix is everywhere. I see through her lies.
Relapse, who I like to call just The Doctor in my head, is so far in the mutant closet he's playing with Aslan in Narnia. I have no idea what that must be like for him. I never got the chance to hide what I was. I suppose I'm a bit jealous. I mean he can actually help people. I'm just a copy cat. I wonder who Fallow really is though. She called him "brother". Maybe I'm not the only one running from others?
They are more like you than you think.
I'm glad to have them around though. I don't think I'd be very good on my own. I may have to have a "okay what do you do and how do I control it if I need your power" talk with them though. They may be the only thing standing between me and well, Brimstone Academy and everyone else who wants to kill me for accusing Jean Grey of not being Jean Grey. And here I thought life was going to be better once I got away from Frost.
I just hope Jonas doesn't hate me. I know he wanted to come with but I just... I miss him. I miss him so much and wish he would have come with me. I don't think Anna would have died if he was with me.
You'll see him soon. He thinks about you every night.
~Brianna Murphy~
A.K.A Fuse